People are strange ...

when you're a stranger ... faces look ugly when you're alone. It's a Door's/Jim Morrison kind of day, like its time to break on through to the other side. So with that, we're off!

Bill Simmons, @sportsguy33 on Twitter, has quickly become one of my favorite writers. I know he's an author too, but I prefer to read his musings on sports and life. Nothing lights my fire like his mailbag, which I usually salivate over in a manner similar to the Bumpuses' bloodhounds snatching the Parker's Christmas turkey. Fa-ra-ra-ra-ra ... ra-ra .. ra .. ra. Unfortunately his mailbags are becoming as rare as a hairy nosed wombat. So Bill, if you're reading, the time to hesitate is through! No time to wallow in the mire! Get a Mailbag out!!!!

His newest creation is Grantland.com on ESPN.com, and it's a cornucopia of great sports/life/pop culture reading. Here are two nice pieces, one on Mad Men and the other on Downton Abbey (which if you're not watching, you're not cool. Just sayin.)

http://www.grantland.com/blog/hollywood-prospectus/post/_/id/47778/mad-men-power-rankings-episode-505-signal-30

Thoughts: Don is the Wilt Chamberlain of the series (in more ways than one!) so to ever rank him somewhere other than #1 is to revisit Karl Malone winning the 1997 NBA MVP award over His Airness ... and you know how that turned out! Lane Pryce knocks out Pete Campbell using Everett Ulysses McGill's bareknuckle skills and jumps up to #2. I credit his rise to kissing Joan Holloway. Anytime someone who looks like Lane kisses someone who looks like Joan (even though she quickly put an end to Lane trying to love her two times), there's gonna be a bump! In the rankings of course.

http://www.grantland.com/blog/hollywood-prospectus/post/_/id/47793/egads-maggie-smith-to-decamp-from-downton-abbey

Thoughts: It's too bad Professor McGonagall is going to be leaving the series. But let's be honest, she's already a Dame (the female equivalent to a knight in the UK), she has FU money from her days at Hogwarts, and she's stolen enough scenes in Downton's first two seasons to make D.B. Cooper proud. If the rumors are true, adieu Dame Maggie Smith! A dog with a bone, an actress out alone ... riders on the storm.

BTW ... British newpapers are pretty much just tabloids masquerading as journalism. Don't believe me? Google the cellphone tapping scandal which continues ... or look up the reporting on the on marital indiscretions of Wayne Rooney or Ryan Giggs. You think you would find articles like that in the New York Times (all the news that's fit to print!), the USA Today, the Wall Street Journal, or the Cincinnati Enquirer?

Oh, the Gunners lost yesterday to Wigan. Typically soft parade performance from the Gunners. You know, one scintillating moment (Touch Me) in an otherwise forgettable performance (Name another song from that album! No googling allowed!!). I could go on about the officiating - Wigan wasted more time in the last 80 minutes of the match than Congress debating the Buffet Rule (like it was going to pass ... Republican's voting to raise the taxes on the rich .. good one!). But it's more about the poor performance of the Gunners, at home, to a relegation threatened team. That I left Johan Djourou off my list of surplus players yesterday was galling, at least as bad as his slow jog back from an Arsenal corner which lead to Wigan's first goal. If Aaron Ramsey's form was any poorer, he'd be Haitian. Arsene has yet to understand the concept of needing four exceptional players at each central defense and central midfielder positions. Injuries, suspensions, and poor form require players in the middle of the pitch who can perform. Sadly, Arsenal doesn't have enough of those players. Okay, enough of my British English, this isn't Beatles day!

The Reds open up a three game set with the Cardinals tonight. Johnny Cueto is on the hill against Kyle Lohse. It's all about the bats in this series, and pretty much every series for the Reds. Their pitching will be good enough over the course of the season. But outside of Votto, Phillips, and Bruce who is going to hit? Dusty needs to light some guys on fiiirrrrreeeeee and get on a roll!

Good basketball workouts last night to start the offseason program. 11 guys in the gym working hard to get better. Back at it today!! On a side note ... the AAU program's that use our gym are an unpickable wedgie. No matter how we try to adjust our schedule, they just stay up our butt. It's one thing to be accommodating, it's another to be taken advantage of by a group with different goals than your own. The gym at Clark exists for Clark athletes, not as a way to pad the paychecks of the non-profit (ha .. ha) AAU coaches.

The Cougars are going to make the scene week to week, hour to hour, day to day!!! Break on through to the other side (of the MVC)!!!

 Now you know ... Yo Slick ... Blow!