Is trimming a unibrow considered a part of proper male grooming?

What a weekend!! Lots of M's on the agenda:Mailbag, Men's Basketball USA style, Metta World Peace, Max's All-Star game recap, ManU v. ManCity, Mobbin van Persie ... okay his name is Robin but it ruined the pattern and set off facial tics in the OCD readers of the blog. One important M I'm leaving out today - Mad Men. Saving that gem of an episode for tomorrow. Just know one thing: WOW!!! So let's get it started!!!


Finally ... Bill Simmons ... has written a new ... mailbag!!! On a Monday no less!!! That is more moneyball than Tiger Woods in a cocktail lounge!!! Simmons is one of four current sports writers I would drop a baby to read (Paul Daugherty, Pat Forde, and Rick Reilly round out the quartet. Gregg Easterbrook is excellent as well, but he's not regular. Take some Metamucil Gregg!!). Some of Simmons' other writing is more technically excellent, but his Mailbags are raw stream of consciousness. He get's into Team USA - basketball variety today. Team USA is going to be loaded: Kobe, LeBron, D-Wade, Durantula, D-Rose, CP3, Melo, K-Love, and Tyson Chandler are his nine definite guys. His list after that is: Blake Griffin, Russel Westbrook, Andrew Bynum, Chris Bosh, LeMarcus Aldridge, Steph Curry, Eric Gordon, Andre Iguodola, Tim Duncan, Kevin Garnett and Unibrow Davis. Who do you pick? Simmons picks Westbrook, Garnett and ..... the Unibrow? A man is entitled to his opinion, even if he is as wrong as President Obama's Final Four picks. Team USA is missing a shooter and some size. While KG and the 'Brow give size (more on this in a minute), Westbrook is a serial bricklayer (42% FG, 33% 3FG). He pisses the mild-mannered Darantula off with his ill advised jacks .. how is Kobe or D-Wade or Melo (3 gunners from the womb) going to react after Westbrook takes his fourth horrible shot in a row. He's out! Steph Curry (49% FG, 45% 3FG, 90% FT) gets the shooter spot on my team. Stats and personality give Curry the edge. As for the 'Brow, you gotta be kidding me!!!! He was dominant defensively in college, but so was Adonal Foyle. Spain is going to be the main competition with the Gasol brothers and Serge Ibaka (who is really from the Congo but somehow gets to play for Spain). The 'Brow would get WORKED by all three of these guys ... maybe not in two years but today that's the fact. Offensively he has fewer options than a Yugo (info here for the younger readers: Yugo). Andrew Bynum gets this spot, even if he might go Metta World Peace on a poor Tunisian in a group stage game. For the last spot I go with Blake Griffin simply because I need to be entertained during blowouts. There are really only two teams who can play with the US in this tournament: Argentina and Spain. What better way to be entertained during blowouts than watching Blake Griffin catch 32309 alley-oops? I know, right? So that's my team ... who are you picking?

As for Metta World Peace (Ron Artest), you be the judge. Intentional? Accidental? Flagrant? Whatever your opinion, a long suspension and hefty fine await Metta .. straight cash homie.

Traveled to Columbus for the Ohio North-South All-Star game to watch Max Hassel play in his final high school competition. It was a great event put on by the Ohio High School Basketball Coaches Association. Max played well, and it was great to see several people up in Columbus supporting Max. Paul Woodson, a former Clark player, was my right hand man on the trip and told me he was going to verbally commit to Lincoln Memorial University in Tennessee. Max should be deciding soon where he is going to take his talents next season. He has been criminally under-recruited and is going to have an excellent college career wherever he decides to play.

Arsenal drew with Chelsea on Saturday morning to stay three points ahead of fourth place Newcastle United, six points ahead of fifth place Tottenham, and seven points ahead of sixth place Chelsea. Right after I posted Friday's blog about perennial Arsenal killer Didier Drogba, he was ruled out of the game through injury. Chelsea's attack would be headed by Fernando Torres, who scores about as often as Mister Rogers. Arsenal created a few chances, but could only hit the woodwork three times. Robin van Persie did score the Professional Footballers Association Player of the Year Award on Sunday night after netting 27 goals in Arsenal's 35 games this season. If Arsene Wenger takes his head out of the sand and signs some players to surround RvP, next season could see the Gunners back fighting for a title instead of being content with a Champions League spot.

The real soccer news this weekend was Real Madrid's 2-1 win over Barcelona, and Manchester United's 4-4 draw with Everton. Real's win clinches the La Liga title if anyone cares about La Liga (La Liga is about exciting as John Carter. Only two teams have any chance to win the title each year. It's the Yankees squared times 10. Boring!) The real excitement is now at the top of Premier League where only three points separate Manchester United and Manchester City for the top spot. Those two teams face each other this week at the Etihad Stadium (Man City's home stadium) in what will essentially be the title decider. For the soccer illiterate in the audience, a win is worth three points, a tie is worth one point, and a loss is worth a politically incorrect zero points. If two teams are tied, the first tie-breaker is goal differential (Man City is way ahead of United on goal differential). A City win puts them tied on points with United holding a large goal differential advantage. A United win puts them up by six points with two games to play. The game is next Monday, which means I'll be watching on DVR delay. Riot police have already been deployed (or should be). I'd keep all the women and children inside just to be safe.

The Reds split with the Iowa Cubs over the weekend in very uninspiring fashion. Still a lot of unresolved issues on Dusty's Last Stand. The Cubs are Bad News Bears horrible, but even Chico's Bail Bonds doesn't want their name sullied by the losers in Wrigley. The Reds face three tough pitchers in a row against the Frisco Giants starting Tuesday, so we'll see if the Reds offense is coming around or the Cubs' pitching was just that bad. At least I can look forward to six games against the Cubs and Lastros starting Thursday.

I leave you today with a short video clip of one of my bestfriend's son dunking. Clark's #1 Recruit He's an 8th grade doppleganger of his dad. Enrolling at Clark anyday now!!! Get your popcorn ready!!!