We gotta move these color TVs ....

Hey ... your Momma's so fat that THX can't even surround her!! Yo .. why did I see your Mom laying on her stomach in that TV commercial for laser back hair removal??? Maaaaannnnnn ... your Momma's so old she watches TV like Michael Jackson ... it don't matter if it's black & white!!! Okay .. enough of that .. I was never very good at 'Your Momma" jokes .. but I am pretty good at watching good TV shows. With the passing of ODiC, there is going to be less time for me to watch fluff on TV. My primetime lineup starts at 7 PM and lasts till about 10 PM on channel 1309 for those of you who are Time Warner subscribers, with the occasional Arsenal soccer match thrown in on Saturday mornings or Wednesday afternoons. So any 'shows' I watch are relegated to the DVR or squeezed around my sporting preferences. All which leads to tonight's channel conundrum culminating at approximately 10 PM: the end of the Reds-Angels game or Duck Dynasty???? See where I'm going with this???? If you're lucky enough to be the King of your Castle, the Commander of the Remote Control, the Keeper of the Man Cave, the Brains behind the Boob Tube (Hey! Get your minds out of the gutter .. that's not an internet porn site .. at least that I know of!!) ... or if you just get to make the TV viewing choice at your dwelling ... which shows are on your "Must See" list. I'll open the floor up for debate .... settle down .... this isn't the Jerry Springer Show!! ... we'll start with Mr. Kerr.

Who? Me? Okay ... ummmmm ... well ... thank you, Mr. Kerr, for allowing me to bat lead off on this topic. Here are the shows I will do anything to see on time:

1. Mad Men (AMC) - Far and away my favorite show currently on TV. And in a total coincidence and in noooo way a shameless plug, it returns for season 6 this Sunday night. Season 5 was a drop-off for a show which up to that point had been head and shoulders above anything else in the 1400 channel universe, but I expect season 6 to return to it's masterful ways. Sterling, Cooper, Draper, Pryce (although is the Pryce still included in the agency's name after Lane hung himself in Season 5?) has undergone many changes since the series was originally set in 1960. Don is no longer on the perpetual prowl, the advertising business has evolved from print to television, the old agency bought out and eventually replaced with a newer, bolder agency, Roger Sterling - this show's Dowager Countess - has shuffled through two marriages and millions of dollars, and Peggy has evolved from doormat to the corner office with a view at a different agency. But some things have remained more or less unchanged, most notably Joan (a drooling great thing) and Pete Campbell (a douchy thing). Netflix will have you caught up in time to be current Sunday night if you hurry (and you don't stop to rewatch season 5's 'Far Away Places' episode to oogle Jane Seigel Sterling on the way to the acid party!).

2. Downton Abbey (PBS) - Who says the Brits can't make good TV?!?! Dr. Who?? Fuhgetaboutit!! Drop into Downton and watch Olde English money attempt to adapt to the changing world of the early 20th century. Lord Grantham, his family and his stahhff (look .. they are servants .. except they are in a really rich persons house .. call a spade a spade!!) produce the finest soap opera ... wait ... I didn't mean soap opera ... get your hands off my Man Card!!! ... what I meant was ... errrr ... umm ... drama ... yes, that's it ... the finest drama on public television. I'm most amazed at the time period and the dress and the culture (although I must raise this point - season 3 saw several divergence in cultural attitudes which are completely incorrect for the period. Exhibit A - Lord Grantham's support for a homosexual butler. A homosexual male in the 1920s would have been run out of a country estate quicker than Usain Bolt, not protected by a member of the English gentry!). Several key characters (Lady Sybil, Matthew Crawley and William) have been killed off the show the past two seasons and another (Miss O'Brien - fetus murderer!) isn't returning, so it will be interesting to see the new characters sprinkled into the mix. Lady Mary as a single mother should be interesting in a train wreck, 'Mommie Dearest' kind of way.

3. Duck Dynasty (A&E) -

staff meeting .... TBC later this evening!