Now let me get this straight .... the newest diet craze is based on - and I'm quoting directly from Dr. Loren Cordain's website - "eating wholesome, contemporary foods from the food groups our hunter-gatherer ancestors would have thrived on during the Paleolithic ear, the time period from about 2.6 millions years ago to the beginning of the agricultural revolution, about 10,000 years ago." What? You haven't heard about it?? It's the Paleo diet!! And in the course of two days I went from having never heard of it to having seven people describe it to me. I'm not one to get wound up easily, but are you sh*%#ing me!!!! Go back to a Stone Age diet?? When the total human population on the planet was under 1 million (versus today's 7 billion!!!) and the average life expectancy was 18 (a deceiving figure of course due to an enormous infant mortality rate) and only about 30 percent of the total population lived beyond 30 years??? You want me to go back to that diet??? GTFOH!!! The basis Dr. Cordain cites - "decades of research!" - for his diet is the absence of obesity, cancer, diabetes, cardiovascular disease ... he goes on and on ... do you own research. I'm not a doctor, I didn't stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night, I did watch Grey's Anatomy one time though and I did have to learn a little bit about history and historical populations at Miami U. Here's what I know ... how many people under the age of 30 have any of those conditions today outside obesity??? Look around and start counting Sherlock .... it's going to be a very low percentage. Secondly any study of ancient populations can not be definitive because we don't have complete medical records of ancient populations, only snapshots based on the relatively few fossilized bodies scientists have ever recovered and studied. I would hate to imagine what scientists would say about my life ... all 1,261,440,000 seconds of it so far ... if they were given 1000 second long Polaroids of my activity - especially if those Polaroids include my ill-attempted middle hair part or various college experiences (side note: thank God there were no cell phone cameras snapping away in my youth!!!). That's similar to the number of Stone Age bodies scientists have studied in the modern era. The other 99.999921% have been lost to history. And isn't it pretty common dietary knowledge that if you remove processed foods, diary products and refined sugars from your daily caloric intake then you are going to lose weight?? People paid for a book or a website to remind them of this?? Who's the dummy now?? Look .. you can do the South Beach Diet, the Mediterranean Diet, the SeeFood Diet, the Paleo Diet or the EWTFYW Diet .. it doesn't matter. If you eat healthy and exercise then you will have a better chance at avoiding some of the chronic illnesses it took Dr. Cordain decades of research to discover. Take a hike Einstein and let me enjoy my Graeter's!! I've already outlived my Stone Age ancestors, and my Iron Age ancestors and probably my Middle Age ancestors. I'm doing okay!! Skyline cheese coney?? I believe I will!!
Okay ... TV shows ... Mad Men, Downton, Duck Dynasty ... that's were I was!!!
3. Duck Dynasty (A&E) - The Robertson clan, owners of Duck and Buck Commander, wasn't a favorite of mine until recently. I am neither an avid duck hunter - never been actually - or beard grower - I prefer the Mr. Clean look. However I converted to the stupidity as if Benny Hinn had smacked me in the forehead. Network TV comedy shows hold my attention for a gnat-like span. I prefer to find my comedy gold oozing out of redneck reality TV shows the same way Jed Clampett bubbled up some Texas Tea from the hills of Kentucky. And right now there are no one funnier than Si Robertson. Jase Robertson slides in right behind Si on the laugh tracking. The Robertson's wrap you into their cocoon of stupidity so well you forget they are ALL MULTI-MILLIONAIRES!!!! Why can they sit around the duck call room everyday doing nothing and not have a boss - or principal!! - breathing fire down their backs??? Because they have already stacked a lot of paper!!! Viewer beware: These are not your average rednecks!!!
4. Wheeler Dealers & Chasing Classic Cars (Velocity) - I consider both of these shows to be peas in a pod. Deep down .. or if you know me well it's not all that deep .. I wish I was a car restorer/reseller. Or a racecar driver of the sprint car variety. Either way these are my instructional videos of the life I wish I could lead. My Saab - which requires a wrench as frequently as a bird sings - has been the beneficiary of several lessons in automotive repair from Wheeler Dealers. Those of you who ride in the Jet with me beware!!! And Wayne Carini ... let's just say it's my second dream job behind Miami University's Mens' Basketball coach.
5. Mr. Selfridge (PBS) - Hey .... another Masterpiece Classic .... I'm highbrow .... what can I say? Jeremy Piven is Mr. Selfridge and after Entourage I'm pretty much watching any show with J.P. as the lead. Dude can flat out act. But just to make sure the hook is firmly set in my jaw, the producers decided J.P. would be even better in a period show set in London. Yup ... line and sinker as well!! It's only been one episode, but Mr. Selfridge has all the trappings of a Downton-lite and a slice of my Sunday night time.
That's it ... plus live sporting events involving teams I care about .. in other words the Reds, Gunners, Tar Heels, Buckeyes, RedHawks, Musketeers, Bearcats and an occasional NBA game. Got it?? Good!!
Redlegs take 2 of 3 from the Angels .. I'm happy with a series victory over any team with Puljos, Trout and Hamilton in the lineup. I'll take the advice of one of my readers and stick to basketball .. Ha!! No worries .. I'll be back to torment Dusty when time and Dustration presents itself.
Long enough?? Yeah .. I thought so. Have a good weekend everyone!!!
Oh ... and Happy 11th Birthday Ty!!! Growing up way to fast little man!!
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